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My spouse needs more care than I can give

Options that keep a couple together, and the spousal protections Medicaid provides.

Quick answer

Options that keep a couple together, and the spousal protections Medicaid provides.

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Home›By Situation›My spouse needs more care than I can give

Caring for a spouse is different from caring for a parent, financially and otherwise. New York's Community Spouse Resource Allowance and Minimum Monthly Maintenance Needs Allowance exist specifically to protect a spouse who stays in the community.

Short answer

Options that keep a couple together, and the spousal protections Medicaid provides.

What to do, in order

  1. Understand the spousal protections. New York's 2026 Community Spouse Resource Allowance runs $74,820 to $162,660, with a Minimum Monthly Maintenance Needs Allowance of $4,066.50/month.
  2. Look at communities that keep couples together. Several campuses offer more than one level of care on one site.
  3. Be honest about your own health. Spousal caregivers routinely under-report their own decline.
  4. Get an objective assessment. The Area Agency on Aging serving your county can assess both of you at no cost.

Questions families ask

How do I reach the Long-Term Care Ombudsman that covers Staten Island specifically?

Staten Island falls under the New York City region (Region 3) of the Long-Term Care Ombudsman Program, sponsored by the Center for Independence of the Disabled, New York (CIDNY), reachable at 1-888-855-9807 or ltcop@cidny.org. The statewide LTCOP hotline is 1-855-582-6769.

Does the ombudsman need my parent's consent before getting involved?

Yes. The ombudsman acts only with the consent of the resident, or their legal representative if the resident lacks capacity to consent. This surprises many adult children, particularly when a parent with intact decision-making capacity does not want a complaint pursued that the family feels strongly about.

What's the practical difference between calling the ombudsman and calling NYSDOH's complaint line?

The ombudsman advocates for an individual resident and can help resolve a dispute or attend a care conference, but cannot license, inspect, or fine a facility. NYSDOH's Metropolitan Area Regional Office ((212) 417-5990 for Adult Care Facilities, (212) 417-4999 for nursing homes) investigates regulatory complaints and can take enforcement action.

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