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I can't keep doing this alone

Respite, adult day care, and the free local support most families never hear about.

Quick answer

Respite, adult day care, and the free local support most families never hear about.

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If you are reading this at 2 a.m., that is information. Caregiver exhaustion is not a character flaw, and there is more free support in most metros than families ever find.

Short answer

Respite, adult day care, and the free local support most families never hear about.

What to do, in order

  1. Take the exhaustion seriously as a clinical fact. Caregiver strain predicts poor outcomes for both people.
  2. Use respite before you are desperate. New York's 2025 adult day health care median is $144/day; MLTC or NHTD may help cover it depending on eligibility.
  3. Take the free support that exists here. NYC Aging (DFTA) funds caregiver support programs citywide; CASC is the local Staten Island access point.
  4. Get a second opinion on the plan. Your county's Area Agency on Aging will review options at no cost.
  5. Name the thing you are avoiding. Most caregivers know what the next step is months before they take it.

Questions families ask

What's the difference between calling APS and calling NYSDOH's facility complaint line?

Adult Protective Services investigates suspected abuse, neglect or financial exploitation of a vulnerable adult, whether at home or in some care settings, and is reached in Staten Island's borough at (929) 221-8794. NYSDOH's facility complaint line -- (212) 417-5990 for Adult Care Facilities, (212) 417-4999 for nursing homes -- is a separate regulatory channel focused specifically on licensed facility violations.

What happens after I make an APS report on Staten Island?

APS staff generally follow up to assess the situation and determine what intervention, if any, is appropriate -- this can range from connecting the individual with support services to, in more serious cases, coordinating with law enforcement or pursuing legal protective measures. The exact process and timeline depend on the specifics of the case.

Can I report suspected abuse anonymously in New York?

Reports to Adult Protective Services can generally be made without formally identifying yourself as the reporter, though providing contact information can help APS follow up if they need more detail. Confirm the current specifics of anonymous reporting directly with the Staten Island borough office or the citywide DSS-OneNumber line before making a report if this is a concern.

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